Little Bubby

I have the privilege of hanging out with my little bubby all week, just me and him. Since I have him here, I thought what better way to intro Zach than him giving the basics about himself.

​​“I have dystonia. I have muscles in my body that is not working really well, and eyes that aren’t working really well, and a brain that isn’t working really well. My brain has a thing called agenesis corpus callosum. It means my brain isn’t functioning. I only have part of my brain. I have had a lot of friends die. It’s hard for me. I think about them a lot. But when I get sad, I knock boxes down and it makes me feel better. My aniexty makes me do things I don’t want to do. But I have learned to be flexible. If people want to do things for me, like give me picture books, or racecars, or business cards, and come see me it makes me happy. I used to drink energy drinks but they made me worked up, so I don’t drink them anymore. I am passionate about fashion, when I got to college I want to pursue my dreams as a fashion empire. I love music, I want to be a music producer for Eminem, Justin Beiber, and all of them. I like giving people gifts. I would like to give people money for their kids education and computers. I don’t like guns. I like my sister because she used to be a cheerleader, and she used to have anxiety but not anymore (not true). Dad was a cancer survivor, and so was mom (all true). They almost died. If they died I would have missed them and be sad. I will love them dearly. Can I go in my room now?” 

I have a ton of Zach stories in my back pocket that make me laugh and smile but Zach has a lot he has gone through in life that he doesn’t get to process like most of us do. It is true, he has had a lot of his friends and family die through the years, but because of his anxiety, hasn’t been able to say his final goodbyes. He still brings these loved ones up as if it just happened and reminds us of their love and grace in their lifetime and the eternal love God has for them. Though he has experienced a lot of loss, he has also met a lot of awesome people as well. 

His list of disabilities is extensive, but he gets excited because each of these things makes him unique. He has a bunch of passions that change every day…I have never heard about this passion about fashion, but I am a first hand witness of his love for people and God. This is just the first entry of many to come.

Needless to say it is miracle that he is alive, thriving, and loving all that enter his life. 

Make sure to check out Thursdays post, focusing on the question that followed me most of my life…what will happen to Zach? 

When Zach was born, we didn’t know if he would live, and if he did, we didn’t know how long. Now at (almost) 24, he is thriving, making the most of life and loving all he encounters. 

As you can imagine, we have come in contact with many people because of Zach. Some of them have been amazing, showing us and Zach love, support, and laughter. Others won’t even acknowledge Zach or purposefully shut him out verbally or physically. 

Somewhere in my lifetime and walk with Christ, it was put into my head by a “well wisher” that Zachs salvation wasn’t possible because he wasn’t cognitively able to accept Christ and have a true walk with God. 

It destroyed me. 

I didn’t want to believe it was true. But…because I wasn’t at all confident in interpretation of Scripture or theology I just believed what was told to me.

Would be brother not be saved because of a number of disabilities he was born with and had zero control over determine his eternity? 

This is what kept me up at night. This is what made me question the validity of God and Christ’s death on the Cross.

I praise God for the amazing mentor God put in my life, Meegan who met me in this turmoil. 

We were sitting in the local diner we frequented for breakfast and I brought this topic up. I always loved the way Meegan approached answering questions. She would give the different possible outcomes and then wait to hear what I had to say. 

She was hesitant, and more concerned for my hurt than the question itself, and then pointed me to this passage: “See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.”

— Matthew 18:10

While some commentaries note that children in this sense isn’t talking about age, but rather the state of the believer, others call out the Parenthood of God and the act of selfless sacrifice and redemption through Christ for those who have even the smallest bit of faith.

Reading through commentaries and theologians, and the growing relationship between my brother and I throughout the years since that conversation with Meegan, I have no doubt in my mind of Zach’s salvation or relationship with God.

Needless to say it is miracle that he is alive, thriving, and loving all that enter his life.

I can see it when Zach smiles, in his laughter, in his acts of service and kindness to others, in the way he genuinely cares for those in the world who are suffering…

I pray that we all may witness this first-hand…the devoted and unconditional love for another people the way I see God’s devoted and unconditional love for Zach.